BREAKING NEWS -- The Kid's Got Talent

This press release just came to my general-office email. My god, the gems keep rolling in. I don't really know what to say, but I'll try and explain why I think this is so hilarious--if it's not already clear.

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

10-Year Old Boy Crowned
the State Fair’s ‘Most Talented Kid’

Wins 3^rd Annual Kids Talent Showcase

Sacramento, CA – The California State Fair today announced that 10-year old Jerry W. won the title of State Fair’s “Most Talented Kid” at the 3^rd annual Kids Talent Showcase on Tuesday, August 26. Jer won over the judges with a soulful rendition of “Listen” from the “Dream Girls” movie soundtrack.*

J. bested 14 other contestants from all over Northern California to claim the title. In addition to the title, he received a prize package that includes a $250 check and the chance to be King for a Day at the State Fair.**

Each of the 15 finalists performed for 3-minutes and the acts ranged from singing to playing instruments, to tumbling and performing karate demonstrations.

“This year’s contestants really demonstrated the breadth of talent found in today’s youth,” said Assistant General Manager at the California State Fair. “We’ve never had such a wide range of unique talents in this competition, and each year the quality of the finalists gets better and better.”

The top four finalists in the competition will share in the prize pool that includes cash and State fair memorabilia.*** The three runners up included: 13-year old Ally L. who sang “I Am” by Nicole C. Mullen, 10-year old Marly D. who sang “Popular” from the Broadway musical “Wicked,” and 6-year old Gaby C. who did acrobatics and tumbling to a medley of music.”****

* I wish Jeremiah was my son. He sang Beyonce. At the age of 10. At the state fair.

**I also love that Jeremiah beat out three girls and will be KING FOR A DAY.

***By "State Fair memorablia," do they mean leftover prizes from the dart games?

****Um, this doesn't seem particularly talented to me. Tumbling? Isn't that just falling and making it look intentional? She's 6--she does that all the time.