So, as I said in my previous post, this summer is definitely falling under the category of "Summer of New Lows." This title comes from fellow blogger and strong black woman KWalsh, with whom I can always share the lowest of the low moments. As we are both in a transition, surfing the interwebs at all sorts of hours, and trying to put the recess in recession, the opportunities for self-loathing are abundant. However, we make lemonade out of these lemons, mostly by entertaining each other (it probably also helps that she lives on an island, and goes to the beach as often as most people brush their teeth).
But for some reason, the website "Texts From Last Night" (TFLN) doesn't seem to find us hysterical. In one of our mind-meld moments, we revealed to each other that we'd submitted texts to the site and were brutally rebuffed. After all, we'd done some pretty f'ed up ish, and who was TFLN to say that we weren't raunchy/crazy/racist enough for the world to know? I mean, they even have a section called "NEW LOW"--for those moments when "hot mess" just doesn't cover it.
So, as Sojourner has always had to do, I am making my own forum for self-expression, refusing to let the white man silence my voice as it shouts new lows. And, as is often my goal on this blog, I share my lows, so you may find a moment of joy (which, ironically, is the first word my cell comes up with when I try to type 'low' with the T9 feature).
Here are some texts from The Summer of New Lows-- or as I like to call it, TFTSNL.
Judge not lest ye be judged. (note: when demanding something of someone, quoting the bible is always a good start)
(917): new low: drinking red wine and eating taco bell* at 3pm on thursday.
you are not alone in this.
(917): made out with a businessman from minnesota last night.
(860): it was sunday!
(917): i know. i reek of booze and bad choices.
(917): i forgot to mention the epic fail of last night's hook up. he was covered in body hair and had a belly button ring.
what's wrong with me?
(860): eating mozzarella straight out of a five pound bag. summer of new lows!
(917): always chase your birth control with port. it doesn't really matter when you're not getting laid.
(860): looking at the ex-bf's wedding pics on facebook. new low
*Never do this. Your stomach will hold a grudge like a middle school girl.
5 comments:
Haha. Love that KW's still got the 860
LOL to Taco Bell and red wine...at 3pm! Actually, I find it kind of cool. Am I deranged?
can i join tsnl? i share a bed with my sister and average four episodes of law and order a day.
LMAO! i think there should be a whole blog devoted to new lows.
i fell asleep in a bar a couple of weekends ago, and i'd like to say that's a new low, but sadly, it's not.
My dog peed on my bed cause he was mad I hadn't walked him this week cause of my chronic pelvic pain during pregnancy - and I still slept in the bed without changing the sheets. New low.
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